August 21, 2013

Why I’ll never be Super Mom

I'd like to be super mom. I want the energy to hop up in the morning and crank out a quick 3-4 miles, feed the baby and myself before tackling an 8 hour work day, all while looking like a well-polish and perfectly fashionable 20-something. I want to come home and whip up a delicious dinner, feed and bathe the baby put him down and then snuggle with my husband knowing that the laundry is done and the house is clean.

Here's the reality:

I wake up tired and I hit snooze, not once, or twice, but 4-5 times before I drag myself to the baby's room and feed him. My hair isn't done and my teeth aren't brushed when the nanny arrives. I quickly hand her the baby and whip myself into gear - which basically means I brush my teeth, wash my face and throw my hair into a bun. Wearing some variation of jeans and a top, I get to work about 15-30 minutes late and I never eat breakfast. I put in my 8 hours at work and I head home, where I play with the baby, feed him, bathe him and put him down. Shortly after I crash. Somewhere in between all that I eat and chat with my hubby. 

Normally the laundry piles up, along with the mail and the dust. I don't have the time (or the energy) to workout like I'd like and I'm not willing to sacrifice the time I have with my family to do it. 

As a disclosure - my husband is a huge help. He always steps up when I need an extra hand (and most of the time he does it before I even ask). He cooks, cleans, cares for the lawn, works full time and loves on the baby. This post is not meant to imply that I don't have help or that I'm unhappy (neither of which are the case), simply it's meant to say that there are not enough hours in a day to get it all done.  

And so I got some help. We hired a cleaning lady and I feel guilty about it - there, I said it.

I can't do it all so I outsourced and now I feel bad. I'm not super mom and I feel guilty. Does that make me crazy? 

For you more experienced moms or you tournament-winning multi-takers please share your secrets - How do you get it all in - and if you don't get to all the items on a long to-do list, how do you not feel guilty about it at the end of a long day?

Be blessed,
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  1. Well, I was never a super mommy but a very busy one...your correct that there isn't enough time in the day to make it all happen...I was never structured or organized, my mom and dad worked full time jobs so they helped when they were able...At the time, I had 3 children, my poor mother in law was ill and lived with us, I also took in children for a few years until we moved , sold Tupperware, Avon, and oh yeah plants that grew in rocks... I was always tired but greatful that I had the opportunity to stay home with the children. There were many times that I wanted to go to work in the daylight but for 12 years was a "stay at home" was a huge sacrifice financially, but we managed. The house was together as much as possible... but I think at the end of the day we all feel guilty of what we didn't do instead of what we this little piece of advice...when you go to work, just think of what is waiting for you at home, not the dust, laundry, or even a hot meal that you want to prepare...just that smile waiting to see you...that hug you so deserve...hug him for me too....

  2. First of all, after years of mentally battling this very subject, I've decided that being able to accomplish a to-do (at least for me) has less to do with the number of minutes I have available and more with the mood I'm in. For example, there are a couple of "magic hours" in the week where everything seems to fall into place (I find my super powers for a fleeting few moments) and countless "cruddy" hours where I just seem to spin my wheels exerting a ton of energy and accomplishing NOTHING! I've learned that certain things set me up for "magic hour" success, one of which is a clean and organized environment (but that's like a vicious circle for me since I need to be productive to make my space clean and organized.... I digress...) What I'm getting at is that you have probably taken one of the BEST steps towards showing that vicious cycle where it can go. Hiring someone to help with cleaning. There. You have a clean environment, check! You feel more like organizing it, check! Now that you're in a clean and organized environment, you'll feel more like tackling a load of laundry when you honestly can, check! And now that vicious cycle has been BLOWN AWAY all because you were wise enough to tackle that first step. You're a working mom. It's okay to hire help. IT JUST IS. You've just bought yourself a whole bunch more magic hours and inner peace and snuggles with baby which are priceless and everybody knows it. And then, guess what? You may just end up feeling like supermom after all. :-)

  3. You ARE supermom! We're all our own version of it. All that matters is that we love our kids. You're juggling so much, and it sounds to me like you're doing a great job! We definitely all struggle with wanting to do more, though. I guess that's what makes us supermoms after all - *wanting* and trying to be better.

    1. You're so right. It's easy to get caught up in what I'm not doing, some times I just need to take a second to remember how blessed I am and how much I'm putting into it to make sure that my son has a bright future. We all are SUPERMOMS!